It seems so out of context
I’m not sure the direction I want to take this blog, but I plan to start writing in it.
I have had a lot of problems lately with the way people ask questions and the way I respond to them. Take this example for instance. I was walking back from the metro to my apartment. A woman asked me, “When you were walking down there did you see the bus go by?” She also moved her hand in a direction that implied that I was walking in a direction that I didn’t actually come from.
My reply to her was no. I believe that my response was proper and I answered her question, but I didn’t answer her dilemma (as I came from a different direction, and wouldn’t know completely if the bus came from that direction). I felt troubled because, I thought that I truly did not answer what she was trying to find out. I did not have the information which would allow me to properly answer her question.
I then started to think if I were her how could I ask someone to find the best information. I then recognized that I would need to get context along with a reply. Without context to any answer the information is relatively useless. If I would have stated “No, I did not see the bus go by, but I came from that direction” she would have received a much better answer. I don’t feel obliged to answer in this way because the person did not ask for that information.
The problem is that not every situation requires context. This is because there is assumed context. Take the example of asking someone if there is a cab around the corner. If the person responds, yes there is you immediately assume that the cab is available for use. This assumption is applying your own context to the situation. The lady that asked me that initial question applied her context to my answer.
The big take away here is that you can always find more context. There is no purpose to apply your own context when the information is readily available. If the lady asked, “Did you see the bus go by? Which way were you coming from?” or if you were to ask “Is there an available cab around the corner?” Certainly you cannot find 100% of the context needed, but more is better.
September 11th, 2008 |
Personally, I think your answer was doomed before you even opened your mouth. Before you may or may not have correctly assumed the context of her question, you assumed that the motion of her hand was related to her question; with or without context. Even if you correctly assumed the context of her question, an incorrect assumption that her hand motion had any significance would make your assumed context irrelevant.
So where do we go from here? Well, both scenarios that you have described involve “yes” or “no” questions, regardless of whether or not you decide to elaborate on your answer to provide a context that you feel is appropriate based on the assumption of her question’s context. That being said, you may think that asking for clarification of context would solve this issue but that’s assuming she has the time to rephrase her original question. You could always respond with a neutral answer such as “I’m not sure”. But what if you would be sure given the proper context? I’d hate for you to lie, assuming that you’re a moral person of course.
I think that in the end, in an effort to preserve your morality and avoid wrongfully guiding this woman, your best bet is to move your head in a circular motion that could be perceived as either a yes, no, or an “I’m deaf but I’m a nice person” gesture - and then turn and run as fast as you can (in the opposite direction of her hand motion of course). Then she’ll be forced to ask the very same question to next person she sees who hopefully, for her sake, won’t be a loyal fan of thejshow.com (which is sweet by the way). If this person is a thejshow.com reader (and knows a good blog reply when he reads one) he will too move his head in a circular motion and run in the opposite direction of her hand motion; assuming that she makes the motion the second time she asks the question. And now that I think about it, if in mid-sprint you are feeling guilty, you could look back to see if she repeats the hand motion when she asks the question a second time which would at least increase the probability that it has relevence. Eh, screw it… just rip off your tear away pants and do the party boy dance; assuming you’re wearing underwear.